Posts Tagged: freedom

The Erotic is NOT the Pornographic!

The subject said: The Erotic as Power The email read: “You will love this.” My dear friend Jim, who knows my passion and commitment for people to discover what culture has failed to teach them about their capacity for intimacy and their erotic potential, sent to me a reading by Activist and Poet, Audre Lorde… Read more »

Sexual Ethics … or How to Raise Sexually Healthy Kids

I do a lot of clinical work with folks whose sexual understanding, sexual expression and sense of self as a sexual person has been marred by culture, religion, others and often even by themselves.  They speak of feeling isolated and long to be deeply touched and known.  Desire for intimacy and pleasure is as core… Read more »

The Holy Erotic

  I am sitting on the deck at my temporary Santa Barbara writer’s retreat. The sun dances on my eyelids and fills my soul with warm light. I wish I could magically beam all my moss encrusted northwest friends to be in this moment. There is something delicious, luscious even, in warmth on bare skin… Read more »

America’s Sexual Ethic

Silence … just because it cannot be heard, does it have no effect? And ignorance … no responsibility? What is the guiding sexual ethic in our country? Do we have one? If we don’t, does that mean there is not one? Or does that mean that our silence and avoidance is teaching its own kind… Read more »

It’s Your Call

  Have you ever had one of those experiences when you are standing in the presence of someone (or a group of some one’s) who believe that they know what YOU should think, believe, care about? Or who think that what you think or believe is less than, wrong, or worse, evil? These experiences can… Read more »


Its evening … the light is fading … I feel tired, slow, reflective. I spent the last 24 hours with graduate students and colleagues sharing stories of the human sort and was reminded of a word that has found its resonance in the cords of life over the last year. Saudade. Again today, I thought… Read more »

Leash Life … A Parenting Paradox

After a series of events I find myself on a ferry, hopping between island life and the mainland reflecting on parenting teenagers. My web designer says … get a Facebook page My 17 year old says, “Don’t worry, I’ll set it up for you, Mom.” and then sends me a message to “Make me her… Read more »

Women, Mom’s and Oxygen Masks

Sitting on the plane waiting to push off for a 9 hour flight, I watch the automated “safety instructions” on the video screen. Today the language is German and the figure demonstrating what to do is a handsome avatar. As the oxygen mask drops from the ceiling I watch the avatar put the masks securely… Read more »