Work Life Balance is a Myth!

One recent morning I sat at my desk. It was barely nine o’clock and I was already exhausted. The morning light was streaming in from my office window – it was that low warm almost winter light.  I closed my eyes.  “I will read”, I thought – “Not email – but something to settle me,… Read more »


How Sleeping Naked Can Save Your Marriage … And Why Talking Comes Last

  A while ago the beloved and I got in a doozy of an argument.  Now, our arguments are not like four-alarm fires that cause everyone to run for the hills.  That type belonged in my childhood and first marriage.  Our conflicts are a bit more like an oceanic earthquake whose eruption is tempered by… Read more »


5 Ways You May be Slowly Destroying Your Husband and Your Marriage

These days, while I still have a clinical practice, I do even more clinical supervision (helping other clinicians to be better couples, sex and spiritual intimacy therapists).  The other day I was staffing a case with one of my supervisees that was all too familiar.  It was of a couple married 23 years with two… Read more »


In Pursuit of a Sex Positive Gospel …. Restoring Faith in an Erotic God

  As a sex therapist, I commonly see couples who have experienced various forms of sexual dysfunction due to their extensive sex negative cultural and religious upbringing. After observing this pattern, I sought to find the sex positive message I believed to be hidden in the dusty vault of Judeo/Christian collective history. Teaching at a… Read more »



How the Purity Movement Causes Symptoms of Sexual Abuse

I put the paper down.  I was 15 papers in with 17 to go – sexual autobiography assignments of my graduate family therapy students. It was the second paper I had read in the last two hours of a young woman who had pelvic pain and vaginismus.  My stomach was in knots.  How many of these… Read more »